April 10, 2005
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Good Little Rockers Eat Lentils
© The Author, 2005Imagine if you will, the following hotness: orange shoes with chunky black rubber soles, an orange and hot pink flowered mini dress, two spiky pigtails complimented by two gigantic gold earrings fashioned to resemble the face of King Tut. If that outfit doesn’t make you compulsively dial the fashion police, just picture the ensemble decorating the gawky, braces and glasses clad, skinned-kneed pile of bones and angles that was my 11-year old self.
Hot, I say, Hot!
It was not just for my beloved full-length mirror that I was rocking this obviously rad attire for. No—this outfit was meant to be seen and lucky for me, I had the perfect place to be seen in it. I was going to my very first concert—THE B52’s!
My family grew up in a suburb of Detroit whose main offerings to the world include decent public schools and a ski-hill/concert venue called Pine Knob, which my family lived about a mile from. In the summer time, I would sleep with my windows open, and receive murmured lullabies from the likes of Motley Crue, Eddie Money, The Blues Brothers, and Patty LaBelle. So, at age 11, I was more than ready to party at the Knob, especially when my mom mentioned that my favorite band of all time would be coming to play a show.
The B52’s and I have always been tight. One of my favorite games as a girl (who am I kidding—you know I still do it) was to make believe I was the director and lead singer in music video’s and live concerts. I had a canopy bed that had detachable knobs decorating the top of the posts. These made perfect microphones. My costumes were picked out with great care and the process of selecting the perfect costume made for a very messy room. My audience was a captivated array of stuffed animals. They went wild cheering—you wouldn’t believe it, they usually were so well behaved! Needless to say, the process was handled with the greatest of care, and when I wasn’t impersonating all four of The Bangles, I was all four of The B52’s.
On the day of the concert, my mom and I walked to the Knob to avoid traffic. Strutting past the elementary school that I had just graduated from in my outfit of hotness, I remember feeling so teenage. The very fact that I had absolutely no qualms about my mom coming with me to the concert is pretty telling of how teenage I was not, but I was happy in my delusion.
Entering the concert I was so excited to see people dressed funkier than I! Pink hair! Neat tattoos! Drag queens! Stripy tights! Combat boots! Unfortunate mesh shirts! Girls with short hair! Boys with long hair! These ocular confections made me giddy—in our small town of soccer mom’s with paunches, working stiffs in khaki’s, and preppy looking kids and teens, the varsity jacket was the height of fashion culture. Seeing the audience dressed to the gills in wild clothes made me feel like finally my instincts towards crazy costume clothes were not so strange after all! While my look has tamed a bit since middle school and high school, the diverse and far out fashions of the B52’s audience assured me that it was cool to dress as crazy as I wanted. This assurance came in particuarly handy when I was later to attend a very preppy high school, while sporting short crayon red hair, purple cat-eye glasses, home-sewn purple velvet bellbottoms, orange micro-mini skirts, and knee high combat boots.
My mom and I happily made our way past the awesomely dressed attendees to our seats in the shaded pavilion. I sat next to a lisping man who complimented me on my earrings (my beginnings as a fag hag). My very cool and not at all paunchy or soccer-momish mom sat on the other side of me. To my mom’s great joy, the lisping man to my left asked coyly, “Are you two sisters?” I was too young to realise he was complimenting her–it just made me feel like I looked way cool and definatly older.
Soon, the concert began and I went wild. Dancing, jumping, singing, cheering, and getting swept up in the collective excitement of the band was exhilarating. When I closed my eyes I could imagine myself on stage; I could visualize the fans cheering for me. It was an even more satisfying fantasy than my stuffed animal’s cheers—and they were a rowdy bunch. My mom was up on her feet dancing with me and I was pleased to see that she also knew the songs word-for-word as I did. I was surprised, looking around me, to see that not everyone was getting as crazy as we were.
I pointed to a sullen looking group of people, somberly nodding their heads to the beat. I was too young to realize what being self-conscious looked like. “Mom, why aren’t they dancing?”
“I don’t know. You pay a pretty penny to go to a concert—you might as well have fun!”
My mom is full of good advice.
Later, I became aware of what being self-conscious felt like and have even suffered from occasional bouts of it—even at concerts. Thanks to that advice from my all-knowing mamacita, I am always able to shake the feeling loose, close my eyes, and get lost in the music. Soon, I am singing at the top of my lungs and dancing like the nutty thing that I am.
This Friday, my partner surprised me with the invitation to spend money that we don’t really have to go to an Ash concert. At first I hesitated, but then I realized that eating lentils and rice all next week would be worth going to get crazy at a show put on by one of our favorite bands. Shaun and I have always fancied ourselves good little rockers (witness the framed and autographed picture of Everclear on our wall! Witness our framed album covers as our idea of interior decorating! Witness my husband’s idea of a scrapbook—a cruddy photo holder with ticket stubs from every concert ever attended! Witness his idea of high fashion—band t-shirts!). Sometimes an immature move like using your money allotted to purchase a healthy, balanced diet to buy concert tickets is the best way to rock. Because at that point, have not only spent money on the tickets, but you are also going to be malnourished later, so you better damn well have a good time.
And, as always, a good time we had.
What was your favorite/first concert?
Comments (13)
My first real concert was probably Brian Adams with The Hooters at this redneckery known as Weedsport Speedway. (Tagline for their commercials: You know it’s summer when they’re rockin’ at Weedsport!) Not only was I attending, but worked a few hours before and after as a low-level roadie! My mother’s boyfriend was a supervisor, and the hard-working yet gratifying gig paid $6 an hour … a mint back in the day! While we could hear the speedway from our house (including a Milli Vanilli show that sounded curiously like the album), the general cultural backwater where I grew up pretty much kept me from seeing anything before then.
Oh yeah … years earlier, my older brother had offered to get us $6 tickets if we wanted to see some little-known band. Some group called … U2. I was an idiot! I’ve certainly paid a pretty penny to see them every time since.
PS: I would be remiss if I didn’t say how much I enjoyed your story (comment) about seeing the Illinois lottery balls walking down the street after a bit of shopping. Heh. And, yeah, new less obscure pic. I only have one that seems halfway decent every several years or so …
“I sat next to a lisping man who complimented me on my earrings (my beginnings as a fag hag).”
I don’t think I have ever read a more hilarious line in my life! Good thing I wasn’t eating oatmeal too! (oh, ps, nice pun on the word ‘mushy’… loved it!)
Yet another great story. I have to say that the occasional splurge on a good show is most certainly worth it. My last show was Dan Bern at the Bowery Ballroom (20 bucks I didn’t have at liberty to spend, but freaking worth it). It was at the height of the build-up to the presidential election, and he was rocking out with the best anti-Bush lyrics ever. The crowd was so riled up and happy to be there — and the whole show was made worth it when he performed a spectacular cover of a Bruce Springsteen song off of his Nebraska album… damn, was that good.
Anyway, my first concert ever (if you mentally block the two Raffi concerts I went to as a child) was Beck at Roseland. I was in ninth grade (read: just beginning my exodus from the awkward stage) and I have never felt so COOL! I bought a Beck baby tee (remember when those were in style? ew), which I wore that night. Everyone around me had been smoking cigarettes, so the shirt stank, but I hung it out of my window that night so I could re-wear it to school the next day. I mean, I absolutely had to let everyone know how cool Awkward Me really was!
My first concert, and I am really dating myself here, was Jethro Tull. We had a great time and everyone got high. And I pretended to be high, but marijuana doesn’t have a good effect on me, so I went through my teens and twenties pretending that it worked for me. How stupid! But I was really a nerd trying to be cool for many years and didn’t really find myself for a long time.
But my favorite concert of all time was Devo. It was at the Aragon and was so much fun that we were dancing on the seats. “Whip It” tore the house down. I still love Devo. I also love the B52s. And I turned my son onto Jimi Hendrix, which he loves. He, in turn, turned me on to Coldplay. Nice interplay of music in our house.
Lynn
My first concert was a Garth Brooks concert…he was my favorite country singer, and I went with my mom and my brother as well as with a friend of mine and her mom and brother…it was so great. Everyone was singing and dancing and just having a blast. That’s probably my favorite concert because everything was perfect, but I haven’t been to many…I took my mom to go see her favorite band Kiss which was touring with one of my fav. bands Aerosmith which was awesome because they had so many special effects…sigh it was great. I also took my brother to go see his favorite country singer Toby Keith who did a show with Ted Nugent (who I’d never heard of, but his music was awesome)…
The latest concert I took my dad, brother, and mom to was a concert done by Blake Shelton and Joe Nichols too really awesome Country singers. I went crazy because I knew every word to every song. I mean all they had to do was play the first three chords of the song and I was already screaming because I knew what song it was (except for the few older songs they sang…like the theme song from smokey and the bandit…I’d never heard that song.) The concert was awesome though and I couldn’t believe how many people didn’t know the words most of the songs sand. it was crazy. Peace Out and Take Care.
and well worth a week of lentils too! we used to do that the first few years we moved near philly and the bands coming thru were bands we’d longed to see our whole young life- drop the kid off at a sitter, spend a saturday in the sun and come home around 4 with your ears ringing and great memories!
*sigh* my comment will not be near as long as these. ive only been to three concerts that didnt involve violins at large. Sting, Phil Collins, and The Barenaked Ladies. They all rocked. Sting was the best mmm yum
omg…my first concert was at the Tacoma Dome…and it was Bon Jovi. I was 16 and my older sister let me drink before we got there, she was always cool like that! I guess she didn’t know, since she’d been living away since junior high, that I was already an “acomplished” drinker. She was happy she brought me cause I knew the cool, secret, FREE places to park near the Dome. If you pause the video, “Lay Your Hands On Me” during the T-Dome crowd scenes you can see me! Freaky!
Ohh, was The Bravery just great?
First Concert: NIN, Hole, and Marilyn Manson…I mean wow what a bill for my very first concert. I remember having to wait in line outside Blockbuster Music with my cousin, hanging out with these real scummy guys. So much fun, the concert itself was brilliant, only made better by my friend going backstage and having Courtney Love through her boots at him. Ahh, to be young again.
As for favorite, it’s a coin toss. Seeing Dave Matthews Band at Soldier’s Field on a summer night, the whole place packed, everyone singing along, it was an amazing feeling. On the other hand, I saw The Cure for the first time with the love of my life also during that summer. It’s was at The World (now Tweeter) and we had seats but we hung out on the lawn. The music, the night sky, laying there and just feeling that we were the only two people in the world. Highlight had to be singing along to ‘Edge of The Deep Green Sea’ as we stood next to each other at the edge of the lawn.
I have to thank you for this post, haven’t thought about these things in a while and now I’ll be smiling all day
.
Jay “Rawr”
Oddly enough, my first concert was Ash! It was also my first kinda date… that part of the night was horrifying – but Ash were amazing as always – i think i still have the ticket in some box of crap somewhere… haven’t seen them since – i wish i knew they were coming to Chicago..
Thought I’d just tell you, since you are a cat fan, that I did a cat column on my blog. Jeez, I’ve sunk so low that I begging readers to come over!
Lynn
I haven’t been to that many rock concerts. I did see the latest Madonna concert, which was really cool. I think your outfit sounds very stylish in Mystery Inc. kind of way. Yesterday I saw a boy on the train whose hair was parted in the middle and then done in two corn rolls ending in braids that stuck out in the back. His entire mouth was gold teeth and he was wearing two gigantic “gold” earings in the shape of faces. Now that, is class.
Great post!
My first show was Rush at the Brendan Byrne (now Continental Airlines) Arena during their “Power Windows” Tour in the mid-80s. I waited on line at the Ticketron overnight in a January NY blizzard with a few hardcore friends, hoping to get first ten rows on the floor. After the owners of the shop showed up to open an hour late, and punched out their own limits for illegal resale, we got 5th row of the upper tier. Phenomenal show, though. After that, I was all over the place: The Bangles (!) and the Hoodoo Gurus, Gregg Allman (solo) opening for Stevie Ray Vaughan, U2 at the Rosemont Horizon for Joshua Tree, many Allman Brothers and Billy Joel dates, and my first of several trips to see Bruce- only without the E-Street Band.
My favorite 3:
Bruce Springsteen (with band this time!) at the Garden (~summer 2001) (Jungleland over the Rangers’ home ice!)
Billy Joel at the Garden (Miami 2017 where it was meant to be heard)
Warren Zevon at a small hall. (We were in the 2d row- 4 rows in front of his teenage son)
Thanks for sparking the flames of nostalgia!