June 5, 2005
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The Money Changers
© The Author, 2005There are ways to live in an advertisement-saturated society without having your identity branded and your paycheck squandered. In fact, for the media literate, freebie hungry individual, product whoredom can be lucrative and fun; especially once you learn how to stop being the whore and start being the pimp.
Product trials of the past were quite limited, and they often indicated a puny size or a service with an expiration date. While this is still true for many items, there are plenty of products that are yours to keep. Thanks to my lovely partners pimping, we have a nice little harem of products that came to us free of charge from companies so desperate for our spending power and our brand loyalty that they let us come in the back door; we didn’t pay a cent for them. As of now, our freebie collection includes the following:
1.) One Gevalia Coffee Maker and two pounds of Gevalia Coffee
2.) $120 in Best Buy Gift Certificates
3.) Nintendo DS
4.) One iPod FM Transmitter
5.) Nintendo Games (a few)
6.) The complete Rush Hour French Lesson set on MP3
7.) A month of free movie rentals trials (provided by Netflicks and Blockbuster)
8.) A shoddy digital cameraAnd most recently, an iPod Mini!
All of these items came to us from my partner’s hobby of scouring the Internet for free products. Shaun is a tenacious lad, and he is someone who naturally gravitates to the fine print, which are exactly the qualities one needs to possess if they wish to pimp companies for free products. As a person who prefers the larger picture to the details, I am not cut out for this hobby, but for those who think they can rise to the challenge Shaun recommends anything4free.com. This website is a forum where you can get the scoop on companies currently offering free trials. Some of these trials—those that you avoid—cost money. There are also a few wimpy pimps who are not as attentive in their efforts to attain freebies who complain on this forum: ignore them. According to my partner, you can find great leads to freebies after sifting through these few deterrents.
The pimp approach to free trials and product giveaways is interesting because it gives the consumer the chance to demonstrate that they are sick of being loyal to companies; it is time for companies to start showing a bit of loyalty to the consumer. Advertising has come full circle it seems; it has mutated into a crazed, wild, and thrashing beast, and in the process it has overturned the tables of the traditional selling model.
While our homes may not be temples, they are sacred and sales pitches come hurtling into them unrelentingly. When Jesus found ancient dudes money changing in the temple, he got pissed and knocked their tables to the ground. Just don’t be like Jesus and scamper away from the situation without grabbing a little something for your trouble. After all, a pimp’s gotta get paid.
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What are your thoughts on advertising?
Comments (7)
that is quite a hobby of his…. i’m not patient enough to play that game!
This was hilarious. I love your short essays. Have you read “In Short”? It’s a collection of brief nonfiction.
My thoughts on advertising…In 7th grade a took a careers class that had a unit on advertising. The only thing I remember is that food products should be packaged in the color red as that is the most appetizing color. I remember being positively fascinated by the concept that color could induce hunger and boost sales.
I toyed with the idea of going into advertising in college but it was too ambitious of a choice for me when I was 18. I really don’t have strong feelings against advertising, to be honest. Some people see their tactics as immoral, but I have yet to be deeply (or even superficially) bothered by ads. It’s really the consumers decision whether or not they buy something. If they claim the way the product was advertised tricked them into buying something they didn’t want, I have no sympathy for them.
I’m not in the advertising industry so obviously I have very little to go on with my opinion. From what I gather, advertising is the study of human behavior manipulated to serve your needs (or your company’s needs). This may be evidence of my evil streak…my shadow self…but manipulation really fascinates me. I spent a year in college deluding myself into thinking I wanted to go to law school. I think it was the same fascination of the power of manipulation that created a fleeting interest in advertising. Maybe it’s a good thing I was lazy in college. If I’d have gone into advertising or law, I would love the rule bending, morally challenged aspect of my job. But luckily, I chose the highly unmarketable degree in English/creative writing and spend my day doing something a robot could probably do better than me.
good post.
your pic creeps me out.
Perhaps it’s my background in communications, but I’m just plain unimpressed and unmoved by advertising. Once you’ve seen behind the curtain, I guess you just take it for what it is: Hype, pleas and entertainment. It’s rare that an ad will move me to action in any way … and more often than not I don’t even remember what the ad was promoting (this is in large part because the advertising industry is often too clever for its own good, imho). I’ll put much more stock in a trusty movie reviewer, a consumer-interest article or the word of friends where purchasing and spending decisions are concerned.
ryc: Yes indeedy, people underestimate the value of theatre classes. What we learn about preparation, interaction and observation are quite valuable.
Today’s advertising seems to be created by people who are all into some big “in” joke that the rest of us don’t get. It’s the only way I can explain the preponderance of commercials that just aren’t funny, or edifying, or *anything*. And when’s the last time you even remember the product that they are advertising. That McDonald’s thing for the fruit salad is a case in point. It looks just like a chick lit book for TV (or a chick lit cover for magazine ads). I had seen it several times before I even knew it was for a fruit salad–and then I went “yuck” because I hate walnuts. Talk about not getting the info out there…
But way cool that Shaun got all those freebies. A fee iPod Mini! To think what we paid for mine! Go on, tell us what color it is.
RYC: I suppose you could try HenLit. My gut tells me you have to live some of this to make it real, but sometimes good imagination trumps experience. I know that I did my last novel (which never quite gets accepted but gets great rejection letters) has a male protagonist and I’ve never gotten comments that the male character feels false.
Hey, if we don’t try, we’ll never get anywhere, right?
Lynn
wow, I’m slowly melting as I sit in this room without a/c typing this. I really can’t believe how you guys get free stuff. I can never do it. I tried getting a free harry potter book, but they kept sending me to a whole bunch of sites and I just gave up. you wouldn’t happen to want another kitty would you? it’s a boy and it’s fairly young and he’s wandering around my neighborhood. He’s soo pretty and we can’t keep him because my mom hates cats, we don’t have room and my dog also hates cats. I’m contacting all my cat loving friends to see if anyone wants him or I’ll have to take him the the anti-cruelty society.
-Jenn
Of course your moving. Duh! I’m a dork. Anyway, my summer has been fine so far, except for scandals. Missing rings and all of that sort. I’m working on a father’s day skit right now. And I should also be getting ready for work, but I decided to check my email, blogs and I’m checking oasis to see what my grades are. So I should get off the net. Tootles!